GOOD MORNING
I hope you all have had an amazing week thus ..
🕑 Added 2023-06-13 07:51:43 +0000 UTC
GOOD MORNING
I hope you all have had an amazing week thus far - I know it is only Tuesday!!
I wake up this morning feeling better, for those that know me and the trauma my ex instilled in February - I haven't been good.
Most mornings I wake up fearful for the future, fearful that people are out to get me (this is not the case lol) But, this all links back to the trauma of being completely shat on and lied too. It is like PTSD but linked to relationships.
It is so sad that this is how I feel, this is so sad that I have went through that shit and still come out feeling shit? It's like a double shit sandwich isn't it?
Anyways, long and short of it - I feel brighter this morning. I was able to appreciate the sunshine, and my doggy walk. Like, being able to breathe again.
I should be happy, life is good, things are good. Yet, I still remain fearful of the future. Stupid I know.
Why am I writing to you? Stating some of my most intimate thoughts and feelings? Well, the reason I do this, is to show you - that behind every veneer of a well put together person is a bundle of issues, bundle of stress, anxiety, feelings, problems etc etc etc. So, please never judge a book by it's cover, be kind to those around you. It is okay, to not be okay.
terrible things happen to good people daily, so I always remain grateful that I'm healthy, alive, happy, that I have people around me who care.
Writing this is an outlet. I been quiet on the voice notes as I can't face them at the moment... I can't be that girl that's screaming PMA - even though I want to be that girl. Maybe, I will find my sparkle in a few days.
I will still be posting pictures and videos obviously - but this is so much more than that, and my people who have been here for 2+ years will know that we actually give a shit here and it's not some desperate attempt to grab your money and ignore you.
Anyways, I hope you have an excellent day. It has felt really good writing this. x
