thefinerstuff
onlyfans
-----------------------SERVICE----------------------- I cam..
🕑 Added 2021-01-31 17:28:14 +0000 UTC -----------------------SERVICE----------------------- I came to a lot of kinks that are considered “femdom mainstays” fairly late. I knew I was a sadist- relishing in the pain of other people- but I found service to be a difficult thing for me to accept. I didn’t trust that people would simply do things for me because they wanted me to be happy. I never believed subs when they said they wished to serve me “no strings attached.” I could see the strings, the expectations they silently carried. “Service” was often a Trojan Horse for subs to get the play they so desired without outright negotiating it. I’ve heard countless stories from fellow Dommes, who would accept these offers of service only to be confronted with a sub who intentionally does a bad job to earn a ‘punishment,’ or a sub who steals and wears the Domme’s personal undergarments, or a sub who won’t stop pushing for play ‘as a reward’ for doing what THEY offered to do. When I was new, I kept my walls high to protect myself against such manipulations. I hated the idea of a man trying to exert control over me- and I still loathe the idea. But I am wiser now and I know their tricks. However, the flip side of that coin are submissives who have to be coaxed into doing anything. The ones who always require a carrot in front of them to do the simplest task. A tit for tat arrangement is not bad, but constantly having to negotiate compliance with someone who claims to do what I say was exhausting. For a long while there, I felt burnt out. I felt like this idea of a submissive who actually wanted to serve me, to do as I said, not what they wanted me to say, was more fantasy than any sort of reality. I type this, looking across my living room into the kitchen when my sub is cooking me dinner, their collar jangling a bit as they take vegetables out of the oven. They don’t identify as a service submissive, but they are my submissive through and through. I remember asking one time why they enjoyed doing things for me, if it wasn’t erotic for them “I like making you happy. And doing service for you is an easy way to make you happy.” I remember when we first started dating, I just felt totally confused by their total willingness to serve without reward. But as the relationship grew, I felt more and more empowered by their willingness to follow, to obey. They showed me that a good toy will obey. Dominance didn’t have to be an uphill battle where I had to convince someone that they wanted to do as I said (even though they were the one who approached me). All I had to do was no longer entertain people who are not interested in serving. That has been my philosophy since then, and it’s served me well. If someone wants to serve, they’ll show it. They’ll truly want to be under my control, and to do as I say, not as they want. It’s freed me from so much anxiety I once had, that I no longer fear service, and instead welcome it. From good toys, that is.
