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The past few days have felt like a small ray of light breaki..
🕑 Added 2024-12-02 12:49:07 +0000 UTCThe past few days have felt like a small ray of light breaking through a long tunnel. It seems like I can breathe a little easier.
Sometimes, I even catch myself thinking that I might be able to handle depression on my own. But deep down, I know it’s just an illusion, a fragile mirage hiding the reality of my condition.
Most days, I stay home, rarely venturing outside, do new projects and sometimes it feels like the world beyond my window has ceased to exist.
But into this monotony came moments that I’ll remember for a long time. The day before yesterday, my friends invited me to the anniversary celebration of their Japanese bar and tattoo studio. It was an important event for them, and I couldn’t say no.
Since I’ve decided to give up alcоhоl for an entire year, I attended the party sober. Surprisingly, it turned out to be a fascinating experience—I observed people, their joy, their genuine laughter. Staying sober made me feel free and clear-headed, as if I were watching everything from a different perspective.
I still found it hard to smile "and be normal" but I tried.
Yesterday , I went to the opera for the first time in my life. My girls and I decided to make the evening special, and there I was—dressed up, surrounded by the grandeur of the hall and the sounds of music.
It felt like stepping into an entirely new world, strange and majestic.
I can’t say I was completely captivated by it, but it was an experience that left me thinking. Maybe I just haven’t found “my” performance yet—next time, I’ll try something different to better understand this art form.
And yesterday, something small yet magical happened that lifted my spirits: a girl on Instagram bought one of my small paintings. When I found out, I felt a momentary surge of energy, a spark of inspiration that reminded me I’m still capable of creating something valuable ❤️🙏🏽
I can finally see a therapist and buy the medication I need. I truly hope that this will mark the beginning of positive change. I dream of the day when I can feel real lightness, joy, and confidence again
p.s sorry, I had to cover my beautiful friends' faces with emoticons because the site doesn't approve of that :)
