lately, i feel like i have less and less to say. i have no w..
🕑 Added 2022-03-14 18:30:14 +0000 UTC
lately, i feel like i have less and less to say. i have no words for even my friends that i keep in contact with daily. this page was created to not only share what everyone wants to see, but to show who i am as a person, so i keep it real. although, i gotta put on a persona at times, i've never strived to be like those fantasy anime dreamgirl cosplayers who are picture perfect all the time bc that's fake. this is why i always try to tell stories, share my no makeup messy hair days, and show my sexy side during normal tasks like cooking, eating, and cleaning. recently, it just feels like i've been disconnected from everyone because i don't have anything of substance to say. there just isn't much that i feel like is worth saying.
now, to immediately contradict myself, i want to talk about OF girls. other girls. i've subscribed to handful of other people's pages, and i feel like there's such a stark difference in my approach & theirs. why do they charge $15/month just to only post on their feed once every 3 weeks? they really just have the sheer luck of being super popular that they don't have to worry about their turnover rate & really just give nothing? i'm not talking about all the girls out there ofcourse, but i've noticed i have a really large media collection on my page compared to many others. i post daily because you deserve to see from me daily for as long as you're here. even when i don't feel like a person, i will still post. i constantly feel like i'm not doing enough in every aspect of life, but this makes me wonder am i doing too much? am i just doing it wrong? why are they doing so much better than me? maybe i should stop comparing, but i just can't help it when i look at these popular, pretty girls. i do want to be like them, but i want to be me first.
well, that was a lot of words, and i don't even know where i'm going with it. i guess just sharing one of the things that has continued to cross my mind for the whole year that i've been on this platform. i am now going to revert back to my hermit crab shell & meaningless captions bc my brain has nothing else to share. thank you for supporting me 💟
