LotusJayne
fansly
🕑 Added 2022-01-01 18:28:28 +0000 UTC
i feel like i've really found myself this past year. i was getting over a breakup and having a rough time, feeling super insecure and not like myself at all. i wasn't happy for quite a while. i wasn't really sure where i was going with my content, or wasn't sure what i really liked. but as the year went on, i figured out that i was nonbinary and felt super comfortable going by they/them because she/her just felt... wrong. i stopped going by my real name almost completely with my irl friends and family bc it didn't feel right. i didn't feel like i was that person anymore. i changed a lot about myself. i started exploring aesthetics and styles and figuring out what fit me and what felt most comfortable. i still LOVE switching up my style, so that's probably never gonna change, but now i know what i really like! i'm excited to keep exploring looks and styles and make cool outfits :3 i also started listening to a lot of new music, stuff i haven't really touched on much in the past, and oh boy did i find my favorite types of music. i feel so happy listening to stuff that just fits me super well. i listen to almost anything, but it's super cool finding just... a plethora of music that you really, REALLY enjoy. :> i also started watching old shows i used to love when i was younger, so that's made me happy too!
i started doing things for myself that i've never really done before. i realized i have always lived my life trying to please others or trying to live for others. not to get all sad, but i haven't had a very happy life, and as such didn't think i would make it this long. but i'm glad i was strong and pulled through! ToT i started really doing things i like, finding myself, and BEING myself, and it feels so nice. don't get me wrong, i still get sad, insecure, etc... i still have a lot of mental diagnoses that make life a little hard sometimes, but it's gotten easier to deal with since i started changing little things.
++continued in comments
