Hey all… I’m working on coming back and getting back to comm..
🕑 Added 2024-03-06 17:19:20 +0000 UTC
Hey all… I’m working on coming back and getting back to commissions. Not out of the woods yet but getting close.
I’ve missed you a ton and the support has been unreal. It’s been super hard going through a breakup where someone genuinely just didn’t like me and I loved them with all my heart. I’m finally having fun with recording audio again and don’t feel judged. I still need to move at the end of this month, so I might be in and out as I have to pack and move and help my kitty be okay with the move too.
To be transparent, it’s not that the person I dated didn’t like that I did all this. It’s that I had zero space for myself and I was discouraged from being myself. He hated when I dressed comfortably, he hated when I didn’t wear thongs, and he pushed me to do things that I wasn’t comfortable with. It made me resent sexuality and I started to apologize for having a libido and felt gross for wanting sex. And then sex itself was degrading and painful— as much as I am a sub, it just made me feel horrible and mixed up about being sexual, which pushed me away from this. My fetishes are still hella weird, and I’m still the submissive girly you know, but I’m a little sensitive about hitting and slapping right now. Plus I know y’all love me being a top anyway lol <3
I want to come back to this and treat it as something fun. I’m going to set more boundaries and say no more. First and foremost I am a voice actress, and I enjoy moaning into the microphone for your pleasure and entertainment immensely. I will be treating things a lot differently and trying to take a healthier approach to this so I don’t burn out. I am less inclined to post photos every day, and hope you all would be okay with a few times a week. I am also going to be transparent when I don’t like a commission, and be upfront that I might want to be compensated differently for commissions that are harder for me to complete mentally and editing wise.
I would also like to be more transparent going forward that I will be dating people and keeping that part of my life relatively private from online stuff. At this point, I don’t ever see myself sharing people I am dating online. However, I’d like to be able to talk about people I’m seeing on stream sometimes. Mostly funny stories or the fact that I’m going on dates or stuff like that. I’m a real person who desires deeply to be loved and adores affection. It’s why I was polyamorous for a long time. It’s a big part of why I love doing this and being here for you. For the most part, you all are incredibly kind to me.
The fact I have helped some people feel more comfortable in their bodies or more loved with the Audio I make means so much to me, and the fact that even while I was gone and radio silent people messaged me to ask if I was okay, wished me a happy valentines, and all other kinds of sweet messages that made me ugly cry lol.
I want to return to you, and it won’t be immediately perfect, and I might even need some help sometimes, but you mean so much to me. I hope going forward I can set boundaries and keep this a creative outlet.
I’m not perfect, I’m a little guy who is pretty sensitive and squishy going through a hard time. But the little community I’ve built here and on Reddit means a lot to me. I get overwhelmed easily and I get scared sometimes, but you all make me feel so warm and sexy.
Thank you for your patience with me. <3
