To the people who care… Today is Tuesday, January 2, 2024. I..
🕑 Added 2024-01-02 16:46:02 +0000 UTC
To the people who care… Today is Tuesday, January 2, 2024. I did plan to do my weigh in video on the first. Well, I’ve been under the weather lately and yesterday I happened to wake up VERY sick, and I hope to God that’s not an indication of how this year is gonna go. I stayed in bed all morning, and eventually started to really crave Wendy’s nuggets with sweet&sour sauce. So I got up, took a shower, went to the grocery store and then Wendy’s. Spent the afternoon eating and getting myself nourished.
Woke up today super early and feeling perfectly fine! ☺️ I go to 7am meetings, and had every intention of talking to my sponsor about how I need to distance myself from certain people so I can get better. We talked, all was well.
One of those people asked me to bring him to “food share”, which is a thing where they give out free food (veggies, canned goods, boxed goods), to people in need. So I brought him.
This is btw, the same guy who asked me yesterday to borrow $40. Which I also did.
K?
So I sat at food share and waited 30-40 minutes for him. Then drove him home to drop the stuff off, then drove him to work. He was already 10 minutes late.
He got upset with me for pulling up to the front door because he wanted to finish smoking his bowl of weed. I was like dude…. Really?
I already sacrificed an hour of my day to help you and you’re now mad at me for dropping you off at the front door because “oh now they know I’m here”….? What? 🤯 Literally, what? You’re 10 minutes late as it is, and you’re…. Mad at ME because you couldn’t finish getting high before work?!!!!
Rather than communicate, he stormed off. I tried one last time to talk it out with him. He ignored me and stormed off.
So I walked into the liquor store in which he works and asked him.. “really? I just helped you out like that and this is how you treat me?” Ooooomg, he responded in the most ass-backwards way, saying that I’M selfish. 😂 First of all, I’m the one who loaned you $40 yesterday and I just brought you to food share so you’ll have something to eat. I cart you around constantly and yet I am now suddenly “selfish”. Ok. Noted. He told me to eat a cheeseburger and called me a fatso, even tho he wants nothing more than to put his 🍆 in me. 🙃 Like bro. Wtf?!? Where is this coming from, first of all. And also, those “cheeseburgers”, which, for the record, I prefer Big Macs 😉 are what enabled me to loan you the 40 yesterday. 😂 Y’dodo.
But also… he took something I shared at the meeting this morning, spun it around and used it against me. Mind you… this is the same mf who brought a bottle of booze into my car this morning when I generously picked him up for the meeting.
I did ask him… dude, do you really think it’s a good idea to bring alcohol into my car when I’m driving around with a breathalyzer? When I asked him if it was sealed he said “yes Jessica it’s sealed” in a like… dick way. So I was like dude I’m driving around with a breathalyzer in my car, I just don’t want there to be an open container because that’s illegal. He clammed up. Got to the meeting, I went inside but he did not. About 10 minutes later he walks in. He goes on to share about how he had just poured out a pint of liquor. Congratulations.
After the meeting I talked to my sponsor about how I wanted to love certain people from a distance and go to new meetings. She is meeting me a couple towns over in the morning. 🙏
So anyway. Yeah. After all that…. Sigh… See? I’ve been feeling like such a doormat for these people lately. And it was proven to me that no matter how much you bend over backwards for people, they will still complain. CLEARLY, these are the kind of people I’ve been planning to distance myself from and the reason why was proven today beyond a doubt.
I sacrifice so much of my time for you and you call ME selfish.
I loan you money and you criticize the way in which I make it.
Alll because you couldn’t finish getting high before work. And you tell me to check MY program. 😂
Maybe don’t get high all the time. Maybe if you didn’t spend your paycheck at the dispensary you wouldn’t need to GO to food share and you wouldn’t need to beg money off me. 🤷♀️
Through all of his insults and hurtful comments from a 39 year old baby who lives with his mommy, junkie sister, a coke dealer and animal abusers, yes I did push him and hit his face. I suck at throwing punches so I barely hit him. I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have even got out of my car. But how fxcking dare you?!?!
I’ve been going so far out of my way for you to the point where I had to tell my sponsor this morning that I need distance from you…. And you turn around and throw this fit because you couldn’t finish getting high despite being already late for work? 🤯
Soooo that ruined my day and I apologize to YOU. This shouldn’t have happened. NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED, kids.
I hope to be back tomorrow, STUFFING my BEAUTIFUL face with BIG MACS, tyvm, cheeseburgers are for rookies. And I’m not a fatso, I’m a phattie, and you STILL wanna bone me. 🤪
So that’s it. Today I’m gonna be putting the dreaded work into step 4 which btw, this dude doesn’t even have a sponsor, does 0 stepwork, and has the audacity to tell me to work on MY program.
Yup, the same dude who brought alcohol into my car this morning with no sponsor tells me I need to work on MY program. The same 39 year old baby. Yup. 🤪
I will INDEED be working on my program today. I will INDEED be meeting my wonderful sponsor at a new, WAY BETTER meeting at 7am tomorrow. YOU sir, can go F yourself and beg off somebody else. Good riddance.
TL;DR I haven’t made my weigh in video yet because of these obstacles. However, it is coming soon, with plenty of BIG MACS because cheeseburgers are for rookies.
I’m done letting absolute losers F my life up. This is *precisely why* I talked to my sponsor this morning about distancing myself from him, et al.
🤦♀️
I’m sorry. I’ll be back tomorrow.
