ryanporker posts
Posts: 550
Files: 898
Testing the waters for interest here
Anyone keen on seeing the bierstick in use?
"What are you doing in my swamp?"
Shrek 17:6
A man, a mirror, and suspenders
What about these suspenders gets me so damn horny?
From the archive
I may still own this shirt...
Crisis
Someone on Tiktok said that nowadays straight men are dressing like 2002 twinks and gay men are dressing like construction workers and I can't stop thinking about it
Bonus Post
As a token of my appreciation for all this mass y'all are putting on me.
You know me and my moods
Might fuck around and buy a ball stretcher. If anyone has a favorite pair of suction pumps for their udd-- for their nipples, give me a holler. I'm looking for an upgrade.
Waddling Upstairs
No my phone didn't slip out of my sweaty fat hands at the end of this video, why would you even ask that?
Job posting
Accepting applications for someone to supervise what's going on under my gut. Full benefits.
From the archive
Overhang origin story
Swollen Hick
Let's have a chat as I put myself into a food coma
Milk n Cookies
A recipe for happiness
