Hooliham posts
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Messy Sports Bets is back for 2024, starting with MESSY MARCH MADNESS!
After a nice winter off, my Messy Sports Bets series returns in 2024 and begins TODAY with MESSY MARCH MADNESS!I'm attempting to correctly pick the winner of all 63 college basketball tournament games. If I do it, I stay totally clean. But for every pick I get wrong, I get messy! Each round has ...
New video! Physical and mental challenges for Pi Day and St. Patrick's Day
My partner realized it's been a while since she messed me up. So she ambushed me when I was on my way to the gym with two flimsy challenges:For Pi Day, I had a mental challenge: to name the first 10 digits of pi AFTER 3.14. For every number I get correct, she subtracts a pie. Once I get one wron...
New photoset! Physical and mental challenges for Pi Day and St. Patrick's Day
My partner realized it's been a while since she messed me up. So she ambushed me when I was on my way to the gym with two flimsy challenges:For Pi Day, I had a mental challenge: to name the first 10 digits of pi AFTER 3.14. For every number I get correct, she subtracts a pie. Once I get one wron...
Smash the Stripper (Part 2): A Male WAM Story
This is a continuation of Part 1 of the Smash the Stripper story. I recommend reading the first part if you haven't already; it sets the stage for this finale!Scene 3: What Would You Do to Keep This Job?Once again, the crowd’s murmurs became louder and louder. Archie handed the scissors to Mr....
Smash the Sweetheart (Part 2): A Female WAM Story
This is a continuation of Part 1 of the Smash the Sweetheart story. I recommend reading the first part if you haven't already; it sets the stage for this finale!Scene 3: What Would You Do to Keep This Job?Once again, the crowd’s murmurs became louder and louder. Alexis handed the scissors to M...
Smash the Stripper (Part 1): A Male WAM Story
Scene 1: Have You Ever Considered Using Your Good Looks for Money?Steven was always kind of shy, the type that would disappear in a room full of people. It didn’t help that he was pretty skinny, kind of short, devoid of facial hair, and didn’t drink a lot, which made people wonder whether he was...
Smash the Sweetheart (Part 1): A Female WAM Story
Scene 1: Have You Ever Considered Using Your Good Looks for Money?For as long as she could remember, Reese was a dancer. She practically lived in the studio growing up, she was on the Dance Team in college, and now, at the ripe old age of 23, she had landed a coveted spot on the dance squad for the ...
From the vault! The wildest pandemic workout you've ever seen
During the pandemic, while I couldn't bring anyone in to shoot with me, I created a series of "workout" videos that were really just a flimsy reason for me to get messy. This was probably the wildest one I ever did!https://drive.google.com/file/d/1QzsBTBOp-fbScqHM6Af4j3M2Al41LWOb/view?us...
(Male Version) Life's a B**ch: A What Would You Do Story (Part 3 of 3)
Read Parts 1 and 2 here:https://www.patreon.com/posts/male-version-b-1-98009579 https://www.patreon.com/posts/male-version-b-2-98417930(If you read Parts 1 and 2, lucky you! You can skip down to the Finale section of the story below!)IntroductionIt was Day 1 of the inaugural Life’s a Beach Festiva...
(Female Version) Life's a B**ch: A What Would You Do Story (Part 3 of 3)
Read Parts 1 and 2 here:https://www.patreon.com/posts/female-version-b-98009499https://www.patreon.com/posts/female-version-b-98417831(If you read Parts 1 and 2, lucky you! You can skip down to the Finale section of the story below!)IntroductionIt was Day 1 of the inaugural Life’s a Beach Festival...
(Male Version) Life's a B**ch: A What Would You Do Story (Part 2 of 3)
Read Part 1 here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/male-version-b-1-98009579(If you read Part 1, lucky you! You can skip down to the Round 5 section of the story below!)IntroductionIt was Day 1 of the inaugural Life’s a Beach Festival, a 4-day music festival being held for the first time on the beach...
(Female Version) Life's a B**ch: A What Would You Do Story (Part 2 of 3)
Read Part 1 here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/female-version-b-98009499(If you read Part 1, lucky you! You can skip down to the Round 5 section of the story below!)IntroductionIt was Day 1 of the inaugural Life’s a Beach Festival, a 4-day music festival being held for the first time on the beach...
(Male Version) Life's a B**ch: A What Would You Do Story (Part 1 of 3)
“Do you smell that?”It was a bright, sunny early afternoon in Daytona Beach, Florida, and the start of the long Memorial Day weekend. The air was warm and full of possibility. The days were getting longer, the temperatures getting warmer. It was also Day 1 of the inaugural Life’s a Beach Festi...
(Female Version) Life's a B**ch: A What Would You Do Story (Part 1 of 3)
“Do you smell that?”It was a bright, sunny early afternoon in Daytona Beach, Florida, and the start of the long Memorial Day weekend. The air was warm and full of possibility. The days were getting longer, the temperatures getting warmer. It was also Day 1 of the inaugural Life’s a Beach Festi...
Wetlook #4: So Fresh, So Pink
I've got some messy stuff next, but one last wet outfit for you...What good is a workout outfit if you can't get drenched in it?
Wetlook #3: The Nude-Colored Bodysuit
I have way too many outfits I want to use in videos.I just got this bodysuit in the mail last week. It's so soft and stretchy, not to mention pretty much my exact skin tone, that I had to soak it immediately.Can't wait to smother it in pies and slime!
Wetlook #2: Office Stooge Gets Soaked
I have way too many outfits I want to use in videos.It's my first time using dressy clothes in a shoot! If you use your imagination, it's like you dunked your boss in a dunk tank 🙃
Guys, I think I like wetlook a lot!
I have way too many outfits I want to use in videos.Here's one to commemorate my Spurs crashing out of the FA Cup at the hands of the Death Star, Man City. Who needs trophies anyway?
More from the vault! Messy Workouts, Part 1!
I've been busy moving over the last couple of weeks, so while I get settled, I have some videos from the vault to share with you!During the pandemic, I created a silly workout series using pies as 'weights'. Here's the first of those videos, featuring my extremely long pandemic hair!
From the Vault! Well, at least I tried...
I'm a huge wrestling fan, and the showmanship and gratuitous fake violence lends itself well to the kind of thing that happens in pie fights.A couple of years ago, I tried giving a promo for the very first time. It was laughably bad, and looking back at it, I deserved the pies I got. Hope you en...
Another new substance test: Brownie batter?
I always wanted to get dumped on with thick chocolate. This might be thinner than I'd like, but if I thickened it, would it look promising? Let me know what you think!
Another Hooliham Classic: The WAM Carnival!
Hey, I never said I was a great screenwriter!A few years ago, an interactive story was published on the UMD called The WAM Carnival, where you had to find your way through a fictional messy carnival without losing your clothes and dignity while remaining as clean as possible. I tried (and failed) se...
Testing out new slime from Splatter Emporium!
For the longest time, I've been obsessed with the idea of being gunged UK-style. Splatter Emporium has given me that chance at an affordable rate, and now I can't get enough of it!SE recently released a new "ultra thick" version of their gunge. So I put on a silly sporty outfit and g...
The Final Video in the "Captain Pie-Merica" Fantasy Football Pie Bet Series!
Free video unlocked for all!Back in 2019, I got involved with a fantasy football account on Twitter who made a challenge: their experts would each pick a wide receiver each week, and you would too. If the player you picked scored lower than every single one of their picks, then you had to take a pie...
New Messy Video! A surprise gift for my girlfriend!
Here's a holiday gift for all my Patrons, regardless of tier!A few days ago it was Christmas morning, and I wanted to surprise my girlfriend when she woke up on the big day. I wrapped it nicely, sat patiently waiting for her to wake up, and ... she didn't like it.And here I thought she was a...
Messy Sports Bets Video #13: What penalty DIDN'T I pick?
It's the latest edition of Messy Sports Bets!Whenever I lose, the Pick Your Punishment board is meant to mix up the messes I get, but rarely do I even get three of them. Until today.Without my knowledge, an "Everything in This Row" square made its way onto the board somehow, and it ended...
Images from Video #13, my latest Messy Sports Bets video!
It's the latest edition of Messy Sports Bets!Whenever I lose, the Pick Your Punishment board is meant to mix up the messes I get, but rarely do I even get three of them. Until today.Without my knowledge, an "Everything in This Row" square made its way onto the board somehow, and it ended...
Images from Video #12, my latest Messy Sports Bets video!
This week, I pay off another slew of lost bets, this time wearing a single strap sports bra, which might be the most emasculating piece of clothing I've ever worn. And THEN I had to do a seemingly impossible cupcake sitting Physical Challenge!But after getting an ice cream sundae dumped in my pa...
Messy Sports Bets Video #12: Messy in My Sundae Best
This week, I pay off another slew of lost bets, this time wearing a single strap sports bra, which might be the most emasculating piece of clothing I've ever worn. And THEN I had to do a seemingly impossible cupcake sitting Physical Challenge!But after getting an ice cream sundae dumped in my pa...
Part 4 of OUTFITS! (Aka, what your subs help me fund 😁)
I love getting messy. But another thing I love is going to a store and trying on new clothes, knowing that they'll all eventually get destroyed under a barrage of cream pies and gooey slime. If only the salespeople knew that!I'm gonna post some new favorites over the next couple of weeks - t...
